


Not as Tough as He'd Like to Be

by boppgoestheweasel



Series: the dadschlatt collection [3]
Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, DadSchlatt, Hurt/Comfort, I'm never sure, Implied Child Abandonment, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Kid Tubbo, Mild Angst, Tubbo gets hurt, am i making too many of these?, and uncle quackity comes to the rescue, god i love this au, is this ooc?, no beta we die like men, not my og au, probably, rated for the cussing, schlatt is not the best dad, uncle quackity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:55:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28403610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boppgoestheweasel/pseuds/boppgoestheweasel
Summary: Tubbo gets hurt while playing outside, and luckily, Quackity is there to help Schlatt patch him up.
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity & Jschlatt, Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo
Series: the dadschlatt collection [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2080011
Comments: 9
Kudos: 345





	Not as Tough as He'd Like to Be

**Author's Note:**

> Hello again! Just some more domestic dadschlatt and uncle quackity :') it's nearly brainrot at this point I love family dynamics.   
> Any requests/suggestions? Leave em in the comment section!!
> 
> As always, the characters are solely based on the characters in the SMP!! If any of the CC's are uncomfortable with any content I make, it will for sure be deleted immediately.

“Tubbo has friends out there?” Quackity asked, taking a sip from his coffee. 

“He sure does. Those… kids are such menaces though. I don’t like them at all.”

The two of them made it a day to hang out at Schlatt’s place, but when he realized he had no one to babysit Tubbo for him, he admitted to Quackity that they would have to watch him themselves. Quackity was fine with it, obviously, but it annoyed Schlatt just a bit that they couldn’t go out and have fun, like they usually would. No, he had to watch his kid. 

“Oh please, J. They’re… alright. They don’t look too terrible.”

Schlatt would never tell him, but he sometimes hated how positive Quackity was about things all the time. How he could joke about literally anything, laugh anything off without being offended in the slightest. It pissed him off. 

“I’ve never really liked them. Tubbo always comes in all bruised and shit.” Schlatt took a swig from his beer that was held in his left hand. “I guess he’s fine, though. Never any complaints.”

“You’re trying to tell me you didn’t get rough with your friends as a kid?” Quackity laughed. 

“Not at the ripe age of 3, Alex. I don’t even know how old those kids out there are. There’s like, what, three of them?” Schlatt shook his head. “They’re all so much taller than Tubbo. But he insists on playing with them, so maybe you’re right.”

“I’m always right. Who do you call at least eighty times a day when I’m not here in person?” 

Schlatt rolled his eyes while taking another drink. Quackity looked smugly at his coffee. 

“Drinking at twelve in the afternoon?” he looked up at the man who was constantly tipping his bottle up in the air.

“Mind your damn business. You try being a dad.”

“I know a lot of them don’t drink.” Quackity laughed. “Aren’t you afraid that Tubbo will drink something of yours one day?”

“Terrified,” Schlatt said, without missing a beat, “which keeps me drinking.”

“Damn man, you’re gonna fucking die before the kid’s graduation.”

“Hopefully I won’t have him by then.”

“...What?” 

Schlatt looked back at Quackity, and when he saw the look on his face, he almost burst out into laughter.

“Oh cmon, Alex. You really thought I could parent this kid for a whole eighteen years? Hell no!” Schlatt chuckled, “Please, the teen years would be a living hell.”

“J, he’s your fucking son.” Quackity tried to keep a smile, but couldn’t. “You’re just gonna give him away?”

“Uh, yeah,” Schlatt shrugged. “Before I get attached.”

“What the fuck,” Quackity shook his head. “Please, for the love of god, tell me you’re kidding.”

“No, I’m not. I swear on the kid’s life.”

“Schlatt.”

“Alex.”

They stared at each other for a long minute, before Quackity finally realized he wasn’t kidding. No, actually he knew that Schlatt was so full of shit. He wouldn’t be able to give his own kid away like that, he knew that. He knew that by the way that Schlatt would insist that he read Tubbo to sleep, but then saying that he did it for “educational purposes,” or that he only bought the bee plush for the boy because he wouldn’t stop crying. And he knew  _ that  _ wasn’t true because Tubbo would stop crying immediately when Schlatt was even in his line of sight. His own father was his comfort item, and he knew that Schlatt couldn’t give him away. At least, as easily as he says he can.

“When?”

“Huh?”

“When do you plan on giving him away?” Quackity pulled the spoon around the coffee. 

“Uh,” and to that, Schlatt actually looked away. “I don’t fucking know. Someday soon, I guess.”

Suddenly, there was a loud crash outside, followed by the shrill cry of Schlatt’s kid. He and Quackity looked at each other in horror, and then ran out back to see what had happened. 

They found Tubbo laying on the ground, his knees bloody and eyes watery, dripping with sadness. He had dirt all over his face, and was babbling something about sand being in his shoes. He was up against a wall, where a trash can, which was now tipped over beside him, used to be. Schlatt looked around for the kids, anyone, but he saw nobody.

“Oh, what the fuck! I’m gonna get those damn kids and punt them to the  _ moon.”  _ Schlatt stomped angrily out of the alleyway, while Quackity gathered little Tubbo in his arms. 

“Schlatt- Schlatt!” Quackity called, rushing behind the man. “Who cares about them, man? We can ask the kid, and then call some parents… or something. That’s what they do in the movies.” 

Schlatt grumbled, storming back inside the house with Quackity following. Tubbo’s crying died down to only sniffles, but Schlatt’s anger did not.

“Tubbo, what happened?” Quackity asked calmly, setting Tubbo down on a counter in the kitchen while Schlatt went to get the first aid kit and some face wipes. 

He spoke in hiccups and small sobs, but both Quackity and Schlatt were able to understand the story:

Tubbo had been playing with the alleyway kids as usual, and they had started to roughhouse just a tad. He had asked them to stop, but they kept picking on each other before starting to pick on  _ him,  _ and that’s when the trouble started. He had been telling them to stop for a while, but they just continued to shove him around and to the ground, hence the dirt on his face. He shoved one of the kids, but the kid shoved back, and maybe a bit too hard, sending Tubbo into the trashcan and the wall. 

Schlatt came back from the bathroom fuming, and Quackity couldn’t tell whether he was upset that he now had to worry about some kind of medical bill to pay, or if he was upset at the kids for bullying his own kid. Maybe it was both.

“Does anything feel broken?” Schlatt asked.

“What? He wouldn’t-” Quackity grabbed the first aid kit from Schlatt. “Tubbo, does anything hurt really bad?”

Tubbo shook his head, but then hesitated, before pointing down to his knees. 

“Oh dammit,” Schlatt sighed, looking at the blood coming from the boy’s swollen knees. 

“Looks like just a cut. This is fine, Tubbo, you’ll be okay,” Quackity gave a soft smile, and started to clean the scrapes with the wipes provided by the dad who had alcohol still on his tongue from ten minutes earlier. He was quick to dispose of the bottle. 

Meanwhile Schlatt was wiping at the kid’s face, muttering stupid shit about how he was going to “get those kids,” to which Quackity would respond with “shut up, you can’t do shit to them.” He was right, Schlatt was going to have to find the parents of those fucking kids. 

Quackity was sure to clean the wounds real well, and by the end of the treatment, Tubbo was no longer crying; he just looked sad. 

“What’s wrong bud? Does something still hurt?” Quackity asked, opening up the first aid kit again.

Tubbo shook his head. “I don’t play with them anymore?”

Quackity looked at Schlatt, who turned around to face his kid. 

“No, never. They were very mean to you, and dad doesn’t like it when you get shoved around like that. Especially by some punk kids who don’t know how to act around a kid younger than them.” Schlatt furrowed his brows at his son, an indication of seriousness.

Tubbo’s eyes filled with tears as he looked down. “No more friends?”

Quackity was sure not to miss the fleeting look on Schlatt’s face of sadness and pity for his son. It made the end of his mouth quirk up just a bit.

“Well.. okay, kid. Listen, you’re gonna have bad people in your life. And if they stay, that sucks, but if they go, it’s…” Schlatt faltered. “It’s better for you. You’ll be better without them. Because guess what?”

Tubbo looked up at the man.

“There are tons of people in the world who are good for you. You just need to find them.”

Quackity was taken aback at the small speech the ram-hybrid had just given to the three-year-old sat on the counter before them. Tubbo looked as though he didn’t quite catch all of that, but he nodded anyway. 

Schlatt cleared his throat. “Anyway, what matters is that you’re not dead. I’m gonna give  _ someone  _ a piece of my mind, whether it be those rat children or the parents of!”

“Cmon, Tubbo. You can find a book, and I’ll read it to you.” Quackity lifted Tubbo off the counter and down to the floor, and the boy was stumbling a bit, but made his way to the small room down the hall.

“Thanks for patchin’ him up, I guess. I didn’t know about antiseptic or whatever that sizzly stuff was.” Schlatt didn’t look Quackity in the eyes. 

“You definitely wouldn’t, would you?” Quackity laughed. “Seriously though, they’re just kids. They probably didn’t mean to. It’s not like they were calling him names.”

“What if they were though? What if they teased him about me?” Schlatt wasn’t offended, but he didn’t want Tubbo to be ashamed of him just yet. Then again, if that was the case, maybe the kid would just leave himself one day.

“He would’ve said something, I’m sure. He’s pretty honest.” Quackity took a seat on the couch. “They probably just got too rowdy with him, that’s all. But if you really wanna hustle on over to the kids’ house, we should do it before it’s too late.”

“You would come with me?”

“Well sure, why not?”

Schlatt sighed, closing his eyes, trying to escape his pounding headache. Lately, he hasn't been sleeping. Going to work once Tubbo was in bed, and then coming home at 2-3AM, and sleeping until only 6AM, as Tubbo would get up around that time. On his nights off, he would keep himself awake until the dead hours of the night, simply because he hated himself and needed a reason to loathe himself more. To question his life choices. Quackity knew of this, as sometimes he would have to come over after a rather concerning call to pull Schlatt to bed, before checking on Tubbo, who was oblivious to everything, soundly sleeping.

“No, no. Let’s not. They’re… they’re just kids, you’re right.” Schlatt sat down next to Quackity, and the younger man put a reassuring hand on Schlatt’s shoulder. 

“Go take a fucking nap, man.”

Schlatt looked up at Quackity in disbelief.

“Cmon, it’s alright. I’ve got the kid, I’ll just tell him the truth. That you’re tired.” Quackity laughed, pointing to the back room. “You’ve got that cot in Tubbo’s room. I’ll just tell him to gather some books and stay out here with me.”

Schlatt was incredibly grateful for Quackity, even if the fucker pissed him off sometimes. He was good with kids, and he was a great friend. They wanted to go to business school together, but Schlatt insisted that Alex still went even though he couldn’t go himself. 

He gave a pat to the younger man’s shoulder before standing up, a silent “thank you” that Quackity had grown to understand, because Schlatt was too stubborn to actually say it.

As he walked to the room, he heard Quackity shout at Tubbo to gather books, and right as Schlatt turned the corner into the room, the kid bumped right into him with a pile of books. 

“Papa?”

“Hey kid, I’m just a bit tired. I’ll be out for dinner, okay?”

“Okay.” Tubbo smiled, hugging Schlatt’s legs, and Schlatt couldn’t help himself when he bent down to hug the boy fully. 

“Have fun with Quackity, okay?”

“Okay!” Tubbo was already jumping into Quackity’s lap, and even from the end of the hall, Schlatt could see the beaming grin on his kid’s face.

He sighed, for what seemed like the thousandth time that day, and went to lay down on the cot. The muffled storytime between Quackity and Tubbo drowned out as the man fell asleep, hoping to get at least a bit caught up on the hit TV show called Sleep. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I've really been in the mood to write lately, so please leave any requests or suggestions in the comments! :)


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